FREEMAN'S MIND: EPISODE 45

... large amounts of unrelated stress causing me to nearly go into a mental breakdown, etc...

Goodness, what happened to you back then? And are you sure more Freeman's Mind can't solve it?

i continue to ignore the glowing NEW PMs button and whatever hideous moderator jokes lurk behind it

You're lucky you get any messages at all; I don't even hear from the Moderators, let alone jokes!

Hey man, Pest... Princess... all you 'P' named people, we're all cool here. Let's all hold hands, yeah? Let's all just enjoy some real groovy

I hate PMs. And I'm a guy!

Just curious, when can we expect 45+ for download?

I was wondering too.

I love the song. Can anyone tell me if there are lyrics? If not I shall make them

I couldn't find the lyrics... So I made my own

I am the very model of a modern Major-General

I have information vegitable, animal, and mineral

I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical

From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical.

I'm very well acquainted, too, with matters mathematical

I understand equations, both simple and quadratical

About binomial theorem, I'm teeming with a lot o' news

With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse.

WHERE'S MY CHORUS?!

I'm very good at intergral and differential calculus

I know the scientific names of beings animalculous

In short, in matters vegetable, animal, and mineral

I am the very model of a modern Major-General.

I know out mythic history, King Arthur's and Sir Caradoc's

I answer hard acrostics, I've a pretty taste for paradox

I quote in elegiacs all the crimes of Heliogababalus

In conics I can floor peculiarities parabolous.

"You know, this song is kind of dated."

"It's supposed to be MODERN Major-General..."

"I'm gonna add a new verse."

I can fire at a target and hit it at least half the time

Or graph out an electron path while using only numbers prime

I calculate the fall rate of a bullet shot a thousand yards

And perforate the thick heads of a hundred military guards.

I can make a simulation of an atom bomb and build one, too

Or flank a dozen men and ambush ten of them out of the blue

From SMGs to RPGs, I carry quite an arsenal

And skip around a warzone like a subatomic partical.

STILL NO CHORUS!

Sorry guys forgot the last verse after the tank shoots at him

Every soldier out here wants to kill me for my curiosity

I wage war on the whole damned world because of my tenacity

In matters combat tactical and phisics theoretical

I am the very model of a modern Major-General

I have created subtitles for this and all the other Freeman's Mind episodes.

Ross performs the song on the "Weird Water Stream" for charity by Tom White from Weird Videogames:

Edit: Ross' upload of the stream with original audio; link to start with request in donation message:

... large amounts of unrelated stress causing me to nearly go into a mental breakdown, etc...

Goodness, what happened to you back then? And are you sure more Freeman's Mind can't solve it?

Oh hey, it's a post I made four years ago that I'm now greatly embarrassed by.

Since I can't really remember anything specific back then, I think I was just being a massive prick back then and tried making up a bullshit excuse for it. I hate younger me.