if it was a joke, i apoligize, you got on me early in the morning just before i was going to bed, so my "joke detector" was turned off, but in all fairness red text and exclamation points imply hostility, so i reacted with hostility, saying "learn to use them" implies that you think im stupid. so my reaction was pretty much justified...to me anyway. so my bad.


*looks under banner in my signature* cmon i did ask nicely...

Sorry, I usually ignore sigs the have a big red banner... Hurts my eyes...

its all good.
back to the matter of the zombie plan/story. i have a very good idea where its going and ill write part 2 (maybe final, idk. i like writing ) tomorrow, if im not busy.

My new plan? Flee like extras in Gozzilla movie!

It was a joke?

In all fairness, I'm on your side when it comes to misunderstood sense of humor. If I had a dollar for every time I've ended up with a room full of people, shocked because of some silly joke I made...

Back on topic now: I was watching the remake of Dawn of the Dead the other day, and it struck me how almost every single head shot the characters attempted, was accurate. I've only fired a gun once in my life, and turned out to be a pretty decent shooter, but I don't think in a high stress situation I would be able to hit anything other than the body.

That's why they invented shotguns: 10+ bullets in their general direction, at least 1 aught to hit something vital.

Yes, Shotguns are the weapon of choice in most games and movies, but as the zombie survival guide says, the important thing when fighting zombies is to destroy the brain. At longer ranges, the pellets scatter and there is less range of skull penetration. The thing shotguns really excel at is stopping power. If you find yourself surrounded, you just take that baby out and make your exit by blowing zombies apart. However, the ammo is large and bulky... In the same volume, you could store a lot of rounds for a semi automatic rifle (a superior zombie killer, according to the guide).

Big black Suburban, a shotgun, and the entire rest of the car, (that means everything besides the driver seat) filled with shotgun ammo. Also, a few remote controlled machine guns mounted around the car.

I'd just like to say

HOLY FUCKING SHIT! THIS THREAD HAS BECOME ACTIVE AGAIN!

Raid 700 houses for 700 freezers and fill each freezer with 700 packets of doritos whilst getting the power plants back online (or keeping them online) by holding guns to fellow survivors and making them do it. Then, I defrost and eat.

People think the right way to kill a zombie is to shoot it in the head.
People tend to forget that zombies are dead-brained creatures.

People tend to think setting fire to zombies is a bad thing.
People are correct, zombies don't feel pain, you're just setting fire to random s**t in the process.

Maybe the zombie virus cant stand the heat, therefore, you would be killing the virus and leaving a dead (?) and cured (sort of) body on the ground

In steak sauce?

Some people insist you need to destroy the brain; I say it depends on what kind of zombies we're talking about. This kind of zombie is a logical impossiblity:



But let's say we're talking Left 4 Dead 2 zombies i.e. they're alive, but they're infected with a heavily mutated rabies virus. In that case, let's talk.

First of all, I'm going to have to stay mobile. I can't grow food, so I'll have to move from place to place. I'll pack one suitcase that rolls (like in Zombieland) and walk, or drive cars when I can.

Weapons are very important. I'd prioritize mobility, then stopping power--not the other way around. This rules out the AK-47 as my weapon of choice; it's heavy as fuck and I'll definitely feel it if I need to hike for miles. The M16 might be a good choice, however it has a very complicated design and I would probably break it. The M1 Garand is a good choice as it's only slightly heavier than the M16, can be reloaded and fired extremely quickly and has great stopping power. After that, I'd choose the Spencer Rifle, then the Henry rifle. If worst comes to worst: the 1861 Springfield rifle; the musket is relatively light, shoots a round with insane stopping power, and is hard to break. Loading would be an issue though.

Some people would say that guns are bad for zombie killing as they're heavy and once you run out of ammo, you're fucked. I disagree; I think it's important to be able to put some distance between yourself and the zombies, for fear of getting infected. If I run out of ammo, I could always fix a bayonet and use it as a club.

I would go find my family and friends and try to come up with a plan so we could sustain ourselves. Maybe one of them knows how to grow food. If they're dead, I'd move from grocery store to warehouse to grocery store.

I'm talking about dead brained zombies... Like in resident evil.

Dinner is served

I've only played Resident Evil 5 demo--it was awful. I can't remember last time I've played a game so bad.

Using a rifle or shotgun as a club will only break it. You would have to watch training videos to learn how to use them as melee weapons. Or ask someone you know who is in the National Guard, the Army, the Marine Corps, or in a local SWAT team.

If I were to put down my plan, it would take all 60,000 characters
but I am the zombie master here so, that'll have to do

BTW-I am also using a on-screen keyboard...so ya

*Ahem*
Me and 3 friends will meet up and ready 4 safehouses.
One is a rather large supermarket, one is a rather secluded cricket club (basically a small stone hut), one is a VERY secluded estate (14 houses, stone walls running ALL the way around) and finally, a boat floating in the middle of the Tyne.
Weapons, we will load up with a shotgun, air rifle and light blades, i.e. long knives.
We won't actively hunt the zombies, as that is a sure-fire way of getting infected, only killing the ones that come near us.
We will rotate between the four safe-houses every few days, making us harder to detect.
We will clearly signpost where we will be on what days, so if anyone stumbles upon an empty safehouse, they can find us easily.

Transport-wise, we will have bicycles for primary transport, as they are silent, can carry a fair amount, and don't need fuel. For when shit hits the fan, we'll grab an APC or tank, as there is a rather large manufacturer of such nearby - we will set one up at each safehouse.
Food, we will gorge ourselves on perishables, and then sustain ourselves on a mix of body fat and canned rations.
Drinks, whatever we can get our mitts on and rainwater.
Sorry for the wall of text, but you DID ask.