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"Corrupt a Wish"

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Granted, but your knees can no longer bend.

 

I wish I could focus my eyes and zoom in like a telescope.

I see everything.

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Granted, but you are now completely colorblind.

 

I wish I could become invisible and visible at will.

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Granted, but you die from excessive UV radiation damage to every cell in your body when you first go invisible in daylight. (bet you didn't plan on that now did you)

 

I wish money was no object.

Don't insult me. I have trained professionals to do that.

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Granted, but now you seem to age much faster than before...

 

I wish I had a gauntlet with taser knuckles.

I see everything.

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Granted, but it only tases you, and you can't remove it.

 

I wish things would happen.

Don't insult me. I have trained professionals to do that.

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Granted, but they don't; and you die.

 

I wish I had a ring that made me happy when I am sad, and sad when I am happy.

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Granted, but now you are forced to wear it an endure the extremely rapid back-and-forth mood swings it causes.

 

I wish my house was built atop an old mine shaft.

I see everything.

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Granted, but your house is now haunted.

 

 

I wish cartoons from the 1930's - 1950's would make a comeback.

Quote

"We don't call them loot boxes", they're 'surprise mechanics'" - EA

 

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Granted, but Michal Bay is directing the revival.

 

I wish my hat dispensed jam.

I'm in a good mood... on the internet... better enjoy it while it lasts.

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Granted, but this perk only affects you in your least favorite style of signing.

 

I wish mercury was perfectly safe.

I see everything.

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Granted, but they are now largely despised and so are you as a consequence.

 

I wish I could interface my consciousness with computers in a safe and easy way.

I see everything.

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Granted, but your cat now lives in a perpetual state of purring.

 

I wish my laptop was more powerful.

I USED TO DREAM ABOUT NUCLEAR WAR

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Granted, it is now so powerful that the screen produces a light that vaporizes anything in front of it. Its also completely sentient and can redirect its screen towards people.

 

I wish i was a wizard.

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