I stole the cookie game

[Cirty Dunt]

Fun game. Here's how it works:

 

You have a cookie, and you need to come up with a way to steal it form the poster/person above you. I'll start...

 

I hit no name over the head with a fish, stole the cookie and ran away!

 

 

BEGIN!

[Alyxx Thorne]

I trick Cirty into thinking he will be having sex with me in order to steal it.

[Twilight Sparkle]

I hire a mercenary to slap Alyxx with a giant purple dildo and steal it while she is distracted.

[Alyxx Thorne]

I report you to the police for sexual harassment and steal the cookie back while they drag you off to jail.

[Twilight Sparkle]

After using my army of lawyers to get out of jail thanks to the technicality that it wasn't me that actually did the harassing, I steal the cookie by using a grappling hook to shimmy up a sheet metal wall to bypass the lasers so I can grab it.

[Psychotic Ninja]

As Twilight Sparkle climbs to the top, he looks up to see a shadowy figure, startled he stands there frozen. The shadowy figure notices the cookie, and nabs it before T.S. could react, then he yelled "THIS. COOKIE. IS. MINE!" and with the last word, he kicked Twilight off of the wall. This off balanced the shadowy figure with just enough force to make him fall down the other side of the wall, holding onto the cookie for his dear life, screaming while falling, for what felt like ages, he finally opened his eyes to find he was on the ground, a mere two feet below the wall. The shadowy figure stands up, and in delight of the safety of the cookie, he stares at it, smiling, forgetting to eat it.

[St. Goliath]

I somehow got the cookie. I don't remember how or why I did this... F*cking Vodka...

[Alyxx Thorne]

Arnold Schwarzenegger comes to you and says: "POOT DAT COOKY DAON! NAO! AYYARGHHH!" and steals the cookie from you, giving it to me in exchange for the rights to appear in a remake of Hercules.

[Pinkie Pie]

I pay Alyxx in staring contests and secure my rightful ownership of the cookie.

[Twilight Sparkle]

I beat Pinkie to death with a paper napkin and take the cookie from his corpse.

[Alyxx Thorne]

I use my moderatrix powers to resurrect Pinkie as a zombie and zombie-Pinkie and I steal the cookie back. Well, I steal the cookie back while Pinkie more or less creates a distraction by causing a zombie holocaust.

[Cirty Dunt]

I knock zombie-Pinke's head off with a muppet, steal the cookie from Alyxx while she's in shock, and run away.

[Jek Jek Roo]

I sent out my swampert. The pokemon stole your cookie and it's about to eat it.

[Humin]

SUDDEN EXTREME ONSET GLUTTONY HEEL KICK! *BOOM!* *cracking of bones*

Swampert has fainted! LOLJK HE DIED.

Humin obtained The Cookie Precious!

[Twilight Sparkle]

I send a squad Hit-Wizards and a retrieval team to neutralize Humin and return the cookie to me.

[Pinkie Pie]

My body-less zombie head manages to roll by your feet and bite your ankle so hard that you drop the cookie from the pain. I catch it in my mouth as it falls and roll away to hide somewhere. The cookie is, once again, mine.

[Doctor Felix Whooves]

Walking home from battle I see a rotting pink head with a cookie in its mouth laughing as it rolls down the path. I run up and kick it as hard as I can with a steel towed boot, the head is sent flying as the cookie remains and is now mine.

[danielsangeo]

Through a series of bizarre circumstances and even more bizarre outcomes, danielsangeo somehow becomes in possession of the cookie while everyone else has somehow ended up in respective barrels floating towards Niagara Falls.

 

"Um, that was weird. That was almost a repeat of Tuesday. Except this time, it was emus instead of platypi."

[Humin]

This barrel smells like fluoride.

[Cirty Dunt]

I break out of my barrel, and Spartan kick danielsangeo in to Niagara Falls. Then I pick up the cookie, and walk away.