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Horrible news that would make gamers cry.

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star citizen is cancelled and the devs are run away with the 2 million

Hahahah!

I'd kinda love to see a Kickstarter group do that. :P

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"This just in... You are asleep, and games don't exist in real life... Time to wake up..."

 

What a nightmare...

bi ti ʤi ˈbulzaɪ

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That actually wouldn't be so bad. You wake up to a world without games, so you can invent the first game and become a Brazillionaire!

The Official Accursed Farms Subtitles Compendium: https://goo.gl/aTBvzj

--

Project Manager for Ross's Movie

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Not if they can't exist because games are illegal... And everyone is monitored at all times, in all places...

bi ti ʤi ˈbulzaɪ

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Official legislation goes through making all OSes have a minimum purchase price of $100, and completely outlawing all forms of Linux. Also adds $300 million dollars to the budget for hiking trail maintenance, $200 million for air purification systems in government buildings, $1.2 billion for unspecified NSA spending, and makes tickling you dog's armpits illegal.

 

 

PS: Sorry I turned it into a rant about US legislative issues...

bi ti ʤi ˈbulzaɪ

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The team behind Duke Nukem forever is tasked with heading valve for the upcoming Prequel to HL1(a Wii exclusive) where game-play consists of using the motion controls as a pen to write a 700 page master thesis in theoretical physics at MIT. Valve also announces that this games sales will dictate whether they continue game development, or focus all their efforts on TF2 hat making.

I'm in a good mood... on the internet... better enjoy it while it lasts.

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Legislation goes through making all games lease to play only, and allowing EA to buy every game IP in the world.

bi ti ʤi ˈbulzaɪ

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Gamestop makes portions of games exclusive to their stores. Amazon, Best Buy, Target, and Walmart soon follow through.

Quote

"We don't call them loot boxes", they're 'surprise mechanics'" - EA

 

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Valve seeks legal action against Ex-Machinima Directer, and freelance artist Ross Scott for use of their game footage for profit. (I'd cry man...)

I'm in a good mood... on the internet... better enjoy it while it lasts.

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The AAA gaming industry exploits legal loopholes to shut down all indie developers.

"Reality has a well-known liberal bias." -Stephen Colbert.

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All games come preloaded with the AIDS virus, and they have a required 100 GB install first.

 

(I would love it if we continued like this, just keep adding on to the previous post. Don't have to, just might be funny.)

I'm in a good mood... on the internet... better enjoy it while it lasts.

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Playing a game for more than an hour a week puts you in a video game addiction clinic. In China. Without your vitamins.

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The AAA industries revive arcades, but now instead of a quarter per life now it's a five dollar micro transaction, and you start a game by inserting your credit card into the machine. All new titles are released in arcades with no ports to PC, and only crappy console ports. None of the arcades will be built in a good location, and all of them prohibit drinking, or eating inside.

I'm in a good mood... on the internet... better enjoy it while it lasts.

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The AAA title manufacturers find a legal loophole allowing them to outlaw Linux of any kind from having any form of game made for or installed on it.

bi ti ʤi ˈbulzaɪ

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You can play games on linux? Since when?

 

OT: Valve announces that they are working on HL3, but they decided the 7 years of work doesn't look good, and they delete it to start over.

I'm in a good mood... on the internet... better enjoy it while it lasts.

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You can play games on linux? Since when?

The original DOOM was one of the first major commercial releases for Linux back in 1994. (it was ported in Dave D. Taylor's spare time) You might be surprised at just how good gaming can be on Linux. (I can use a worse-in-every-way laptop than my W7 laptop and get better framerates in almost any game at the same graphics settings, just by switching the OS)

 

Steam decides to become a pay-to-use service, and charges users $50 monthly or they lose all their games permanently.

bi ti ʤi ˈbulzaɪ

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All games now have microtransactions made up of smaller microtransactions.

 

It's like a skill tree, except you pay money and don't actually get anything useful out of it.

Forum Rule #1: "Try not to be a jerk."

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