danielsangeo

Lay off the bath salts, friend.

From the new episode, it probably has my new favorite:

"I'd say I need a surface-to-air missile, but no one should NEED a surface-to-air missile. That should be firmly under 'Wants and Desires.'"

6/10

Took two off for the lack of boobs....and two off for being creepy.

Explosive news rocks the Vatican and the rest of the theological world when it's discovered that Jesus Christ was resurrected as game show host Monty Hall, told from the perspective of Hall's companion: The Count of Monty Christo.

EDIT: Wait, let me pick a different movie. Try this one:

The Full Monty

The Combine Overwiki is not run by Valve. I don't think there's any in-universe evidence for them being a special forces branch of the Marines. True, it lists as such in Opposing Force, but OF was not made by Valve.

Besides, this is the mofo-ing Freeman. Do not question the abilities of the One Free Man!

Military helicopters are armored because they expect to go into battle with possibly heavily armed enemies. In HL, who are they going against? Civilians and security guards? Sure, there are heavily armed aliens now, but do you think they had the time and money to armor their helicopters for that? Remember, this is the HECU, not the regular military.

And, besides, this is the Goddamned Freeman we're talking about. Do not question the Freeman!

I hardly if ever swear in real life. If I do, it's for extreme emphasis and I'm uncomfortable whenever I do it. But my father swears like a sailor.

The story of a man who is betrayed by his wife, but it has so many subplots that don't go anywhere, bad acting and people throwing a football around that, by the end, when...no, wait, that's stupid. No one would make a movie like that.

The Room is about a public restroom where you can catch small glimpses into the lives of random people who come into it, set against the backdrop of a conquering alien invasion force.

The Toxic Avenger

I haven't introduced myself, I think. So, better late than never, here's my intro.

Hi, my name is danielsangeo.

Not Lexxy?

I agree. It was a dam fine episode if I do say so my dam self.

Dammit; you got there before I did, Felix. Here's my take on the Fifth Element:

When five teenage kids mysteriously get rings associated with the classical elements of Earth, Fire, Wind, Water, and Heart, they combine the magical power in the rings to bring forth a mysterious being with the power of saving the planet from destruction.

For Zoolander:

A man visits a local zoo only to find he cannot leave. If he attempts to leave the zoo, he appears in another one in another city, another state, even another country. He must find how to escape the mysterious land of zoos.

Monster House

It's like bringing a gun to a subtitle fight, here's Episode 42.

....oh! I see! I get it now.

Okay, working on the subtitles for this damned thing. Does anyone know what Freeman is saying when

Maybe it's slang and I've never heard the term before.

I actually laughed out loud at this one.

Vah-shir

Well, I have never heard of this movie and, without researching it, I have little to go off of but the name. So, this should be perfect.

Black Snake Moan is a horror movie about a black snake that menaces a group of teenagers in the Florida Everglades. You can tell it's close by the noise it makes: moans.

High School High

A romantic comedy between an ad executive and an Internet blogger.

The Sixth Sense

A group of children prepare for Halloween just as Soviets from the far side of the moon invade. Think Iron Sky, but with Soviets. And Halloween.

Return to Oz

It's okay, we have fluoridated water for that now.

Banned for making me realize that I'll never be a professional cryptologist.

A prequel to Journey to the Center of the Earth.

2001: A Space Odyssey

A movie set in Planet Hollywood.

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