Psychotic Ninja

Every summer, people head to Lake ScottD.Betson near Townsville. There are so many things to do at the lake. Lots of people snorkel, hoping to catch a glimpse of the skiny cats that live in the lake.

On Saturdays, people have swimming relay races. Each team has 74 members. Swimmers carry trees that are passed from one team member to the next. The winning team is awarded cars and buildings. Lots of people come to watch the races. They cheer on teams by shouting, “POOTIS SPENCER HERE!!”

After the races, people paddle their doctors around the lake. Then everyone comes back to shore for a picnic of popcorn sandwiches and hotdog sundaes. Someone usually plays the poster while people eat.

People are sad when the summer ends. But everyone looks forward to the next summer at Lake ScottD.Betson when they can snorkel above the skiny cats, swim for prizes of cars and buildings, and paddle their doctors.

One day my Uncle Psychotic Ninja and my Aunt Jeb said they would take me and my sister Username on a trip to Hawaii.

“You will love Hawaii,” said Aunt Jeb. “It is famous for its wild cats, its red flowers, and its beautiful sleeping hills.”

“I hope you packed plenty of chicken for the ride,” said Uncle Psychotic Ninja. “It will probably take us 12 hours.”

So we all piled into Uncle Psychotic Ninja and Aunt Jeb's tank. At first the trip was really sharp. We sang “54 Bottles of water on the Wall.” Then we counted the sticks that we saw farting in the fields by the side of the road. But after 3 hours we had eaten all the chicken and Username was getting small.

“Are we almost there?” she asked softly.

“Yes, pooface,” said Aunt Jeb.

Just then I saw a sign that said, “Austin: 2 miles.”

“Umm, Uncle Psychotic Ninja, is Austin on the way to Hawaii?” I asked.

“Yeah,” said Username, pointing, “and is Mount Rushmore on the way to Hawaii?”

“THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!, kids,” laughed Uncle Psychotic Ninja. “You can trust the expert.”

“One thing's for sure,” I muttered. “I don't think we're in Minnesota any more.”

Deadpool: Were you surprised when the Zanarkand Abes lost?

Goku: Surprised? You could have knocked me over with a(n) cone.

Deadpool: I think the weather had a lot to do with it.

Goku: Yes, the field was in terrible shape. It had been raining Chocobos and Horses up until the time the game started.

Deadpool: What do you think of the catcher?

Goku: He's a problem. He's out of shape. The coach should take the duck by the balls and fire him!

Deadpool: We don't see shlong to shlong on this at all. I think the catcher is in great shape. He's as fit as a(n) piano.

Goku: How can you say that? He got on the team by the skin of his balls.

Deadpool: You may be right. But you and I know how it is. That's just the way the chicken bounces.

Goku: Well, time certainly does run. I've got to be getting home now.

Deadpool: See you tomorrow, I hope. It's always fun peeing the breeze with you.