Pinkie Pie

Gordon will deny ever meeting Barney, and claim Barney's making up stories about being 'best buddies with THE Freeman' to coast on Gordon's awesomeness

Gordon will hold a grudge about being forced to put that can in the trash by Civil Protection at the beginning of the game for the entire series. He has a doctor's degree and trash pick-up is for the peasants.

After meeting Alyx, Gordon will only battle The Combine in the hope of getting laid. And because 'shooting cops' is the most fun he's ever had. He will declare Alyx to be his girlfriend early on. When he discusses world domination, he'll plan to give her Australia.

In addition to that, he'll re-name City 17 after himself, and he'll declare an entire country or state their vacation house, such as Hawaii, and he'll go into a rant on how easy it will be considering everyone there is probably dead.

When he meets the Antlions, Gordon will make a bunch of Dune references. 'Don't step on the sand. I must walk without rhythmn, or else attract the giant killer bugs'. When he gets the Celaphod and controls the Antlions, he'll proclaim himself the Kwisatz Haderach. That or of Starship Troopers, making it a call back.

Gordon will try to kill Mossman and the friendly Vortigaunts during scripted sequences, but find his gun has mysteriously jammed.

He will call Ravenholm 'Silent Hill' and call the fast zombies Rage Monkeys.

In this case, Gordon genuinely will be dumb/crazy enough to climb inside the pods in the Citadel, letting Breen capture him. That, or he'll hang a massive lampshade on it by mentioning how non-safety compliant The Combine work areas are. But state they are still better than Black Mesa.

He'll try to buddy-buddy with Breen, and get miffed when he gets ignored.

He'll call the Striders "Tripods".

He'll make a BIG deal out of Magnusson's "microwave casserole incident" remark. In fact, he'll probably ramble about it throughout the whole final battle.

He'll take every chance he can get to ransack houses with his newfound Pick Things Up power. He may do what this troper does every time he gets to the first apartment and start throwing stuff out the window, humming Pink Floyd music.

Alyx's remark of "Man of few words, huh?" will be the result of Gordon being hypnotized be her boobs for a few minutes after they first meet.

When Alyx makes the "zombine" joke he'll spend a lengthy amount of time insulting her intelligence, and will probably keep bringing it up at every opportunity. He'll also come up with a funnier alternate joke. He won't genuinely care about Alyx's welfare until she gets hurt in episode two. Then he'll freak out and act like a big softie but deny it as soon as she turns out to be fine.

He'll be worked into a frothy rage by the camera bots and go out of his way to destroy them.

Mike and Dave from Civil Protection will cameo in one episode. Or multiple. One will probably just show Mike and Dave helping somebody(contrasting with the usual brutal behavior of the metrocops), the other will be during a fight with Gordon. Dave will want a piece of him, Mike will want to get the fuck out of there before Gordon can gun them down. Alternatively: Dave has improbable aiming skills. Gordon has an exposed head. Likely, Dave would fire a 9mm bullet to take off whats left of Gordon's ear (apparently that turret gun only took off the bottom half), whereas Gordon will freak out and put a couple of bullets in his chest. Dave will survive thanks to his body armor but will be incapacitated (like that's never happened before...) Mike will of course say something along the lines of "I told you it was a bad idea", while Gordon won't really bother to make sure he's dead.

Gordon: I don't really need to make confirmed kills. I'm not at that stage in my life yet.

Freeman will probably lampshade how Mike sounds a lot like Gordon.

After starting the Uprising and realizing that almost everyone on earth recognizes him as The Messiah, he will discuss his plans to use this to his advantage by overthrowing the combine then becoming the new ruler of earth himself.

Freeman will love Dog due to his admiration of robots. He'll consider ways on how to make an army of Dogs to take over the Combine or just want to make Dog his right-hand man when he takes over the world.

Gordon will make a big deal of the suggestion that Combine portal technology is string-based.

Gordon will spend most of "Our Benefactors" rambling on about making the Citadel his stronghold from which he'll rule the world, and thinking of himself as some kind of immortal god-king due to a combination of the Super Gravity Gun and a supercharged HEV suit.

Gordon will be constantly annoyed at how the resistance bosses and pushes him around everywhere despite the fact they view him as The Messiah.

He'll be unaware of what the Civil Protection officers are at first, and assume that him launching that missile started World War III, and that these are Russian thought police. Further supported by the fact that City 17 actually is in Eastern Europe.

Upon learning that Dr. Breen has basically become ruler of the Earth, Gordon will remark on how he "totally called it that his boss is a James Bond villain".

When Alyx hugs Gordon at the beginning of Episode One, Gordon will say "HOLY SHIT! I ACTUALLY TOUCHED A GIRL!" ◦ ...except he won't do that, because the FM version of Gordon Freeman has already been established as a heavy-partying ladies-man, who has mentally admitted to sexually harassing at least one co-worker at Black Mesa. If anything, he'll over-interpret the hug as Alyx being hot for him, and this being more of an obstacle to getting work done than a benefit.

Gordon will want to accept G-Man's offer, after all he's mentioned having to find a new job. However, Gordon will spend so much time rambling to himself that the window to accept the offer will end and G-Man will teleport him into the room with the 30 alien grunts, while Gordon screams that he wanted to accept the job. But Gordon will reveal that there was one weapon G-Man forgot to confiscate: the crowbar. The series will have a Bolivian Army Ending as Gordon screams and charges at the grunts, crowbar in hand. It would possibly be even better if he just said a giant screw you to the G-Man and crowbar-charged the Grunts in the ending anyway.

Alternately, G-Man, having had the misfortune of listening in on Gordon's thoughts, opts to rescind his offer.

It will end with "Military Precision" being played all the way through, with clips from his adventures at Black Mesa. That, or it will show him being the Freeman we all "know" in the future, only completely inept at his job.

Or, Freeman will just give up on the option of going to Xen.