Who here knew that one day giant lumberjacks would chop down trees and drink cheap cyanide filled Koolaid and go to Epsilon's planet of chicken and sweet tea and guns that shoot boolets? Not only do cows eat grass but also they jump over the moon and leave ponies in rest. It was very nonsensical and confusing, only /b/ could possibly make less sense than the chaotic, random, ambiguous Gordon Freeman's dream. The G-man woke up to a de-railed thread on a very sad day. He was wearing a very expensive diamond encrusted tie and suit with a dark blue pair of socks. His fashion sense was very pimpin'. Everyone was jelly whenever the G-man would roll up into a ball and derail this thread. G-man then got into his purple limousine and drove into a Lake. G-man drowned, but his suit was made of ice cream That froze into a million pieces. Many treasure hunters search for G-man's suit shards but stop because they get very hungry for potatoes and decide to return to idaho. G-man survived though, but his purple limousine got eaten by a wild grue with laser beams. G-man took out his explosive briefcase and threw it at an unsuspecting robotic ghost dragon. Gordon Freeman helped by crowbaring a flying scout's mother and red spy. Any other day Gordon would simply would be busy collecting human skulls, but today he went to crate to crowbar it. The crate exploded, and out came a BLU Pyro. The Pyro's muffled voice yelled, "ICE TO MEET YOU!" "..." Gordon Freeman replied, and crowbarred Pyro in the oxygen tank, causing a large explosion, but Gordon's HEV only saved Gordon and a village of crazed bushmen. One bushman said "So long, and good luck my bespectacled bearded friend.". So he was gone like the horse that Epsilon ate for breakfast. Blightmare then came with a great white shark who Epsilon wrestled like famous pirate Figunaye. Psychotic Ninja was killing ponies. Suddenly, The world stopped in a matter made of Alyxx's collection of rare manly movies, like Commando and Terminator, which are the best movies since sliced bread. All the people wanted to be like Captain Crunch, but Epsilon's awesomeness was too powerful for mere cereal n' milk so he guffawed at Tony the Tiger, who was clawing Captain Figunaye unsuccessfully. Tony then donned his beanie, and get a plan
