Epsilon

Ah, Zakalak.. one of my most trusted scientists/engineers. Would you call my gun "stretching believability" or just "sheer awesomeness?"

Bronies, I think...

Once, a war against the lovers and the haters of Suzimiya Haruhi cause a great grammar fail. Blightmare was then banned due to stuff.

Once, a war against the lovers and the haters of Suzimiya Haruhi cause a great grammar fail. Blightmare

And my hate beam negates your shield's negation of my hate beam. And your shield's negation of my hate beam's negation of your shield.

It's also not stretching believability as much as it is having super awesome engineers.

Once, a war against the lovers and the haters

Each shot melts through 200² yards of anything in its path.

anything in its path.

Also, did you even read what I said? If it didn't melt through the shield, it'd cause an explosion.

Once, a war

I will do so. Allow a beam to hit your pathetic machine and it's history. Block and you, your machines, and your troops are history. Dodge and you've got a beam headed at a squad of troops, another machine, or a wall, which will cause an explosion. Hate is very volatile, even when harnessed, you see.

My engineers have been working fervently, as well.

That's right. A hate rifle. Each particle of the beam fired contains 180 petawatts of hate, and there are quadrillions of particles in each beam fired. The assault rifle is rapid fire, as well.

By the way, that picture is one of our grunts field testing the rifle.. against some Brony prisoners. Works like a charm.

The weapon seen here is merely a prototype; you Bronies and your machines won't be able to "love and tolerate" the completed version.

We've even managed to show you what the inside of the weapon looks like while charging. Those green things you see? Those are the lasers (that consist of quadrillions of hate particles) being charged while in "Complete Annihilation Mode." Each shot melts through 200² yards of anything in its path.

Bear in mind when trying to think of a counter to our weapon: If any of your machines attempt to block it or repel it in any way, it explodes violently, analogous to a nuclear explosion in both size and impact, while not affecting anyone with protection.

Our troops carry shields similar to the ones used by ancient Spartans, except much more effective and durable. The shields are resistant to radiation and explosions, if not immune. In fact, depending on the amount of hate in someone, the explosion has healing properties.

YOU DON'T STAND A CHANCE, BRONIES! SUBMIT WHILE YOU CAN, OR SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES!

Bravo, Username... give me the schematics for the suit, and infinite wealth, power, and fame shall be yours. You shall serve as my second-in-command.

 

You will:

 

Have control over all of our forces.

 

Be honored by every self-respecting member of our empire.

 

Annihilate a thorn in my, as well as many others' sides that has festered for far too long.

 

Plus...

 

I will not indoctrinate you as the Bronies do.

 

So, come on... let's join forces!

 

Where am I in your forces???

You're a scientist; you're too intelligent to be with the cannon fodder.

Bravo, Username... give me the schematics for the suit, and infinite wealth, power, and fame shall be yours. You shall serve as my second-in-command.

You will:

Have control over all of our forces.

Be honored by every self-respecting member of our empire.

Annihilate a thorn in my, as well as many others' sides that has festered for far too long.

Plus...

I will not indoctrinate you as the Bronies do.

So, come on... let's join forces!

It allows me to use Ponies against epsilon

Still. You're using ponies, which are pretty much love in its purest form (*awaits pure/corrupt running gag thing*).

Posting ponies won't stop this war; it only fans the flames. More ponies = more love, which = more hate for us, since we hate love, ergo your solution epic fails.

I live in Cobb County; it's either hot and muggy, or hailing and windy. We rarely see anything mild...

Scattered thunderstorms again today... it's sunny right now, but a severe thunderstorm warning was issued for Habersham County, which is in northeast Georgia.

Ah, a Texan.. it's good to know I'm not the only one here who says "cain't" over "can't."

...Or do you say "kay-ent?"

Did you know that as you grow older, time passes quicker? It's true, relatively speaking: your mental reference for a given amount of time shrinks relative to how much of your life it consists of. WHen you're six years old, one year is perceived as very long because it's 1/6th of your life, but this reference shrinks when you grow older, it's only 1/60th when you're sixty. The mental reference for a second also shrinks just like it does for a year. This dilation of perception is why it seems time passes faster on average as you age.

Did you know that dog farts are possibly the most atrocious smelling thing's that can be emitted from any living being?

I knew both of these, and I've learned the latter the hard way.

Did you know that if you went out into space, you would explode before you suffocated because there's no air pressure?

Who here knew that one day giant lumberjacks would chop down trees and drink cheap cyanide filled Koolaid and go to Epsilon's planet of chicken and sweet tea and guns that shoot boolets? Not only do cows eat grass but also they jump over the moon and leave ponies in rest. It was very nonsensical and confusing, only /b/ could possibly make less sense than the chaotic, random, ambiguous Gordon Freeman's dream. The G-man woke up to a de-railed thread on a very sad day. He was wearing a very expensive diamond encrusted tie and suit with a dark blue pair of socks. His fashion sense was very pimpin'. Everyone was jelly whenever the G-man would roll up into a ball and derail this thread. G-man then got into his purple limousine and drove into a Lake. G-man drowned, but his suit was made of ice cream That froze into a million pieces. Many treasure hunters search for G-man's suit shards but stop because they get very hungry for potatoes and decide to return to idaho. G-man survived though, but his purple limousine got eaten by a wild grue with laser beams. G-man took out his explosive briefcase and threw it at an unsuspecting robotic ghost dragon. Gordon Freeman helped by crowbaring a flying scout's mother and red spy. Any other day Gordon would simply would be busy collecting human skulls, but today he went to crate to crowbar it. The crate exploded, and out came a BLU Pyro. The Pyro's muffled voice yelled, "ICE TO MEET YOU!" "..." Gordon Freeman replied, and crowbarred Pyro in the oxygen tank, causing a large explosion, but Gordon's HEV only saved Gordon and a village of crazed bushmen. One bushman said "So long, and good luck my bespectacled bearded friend.". So he was gone like the horse that Epsilon ate for breakfast. Blightmare then came with a great white shark who Epsilon wrestled like famous pirate Figunaye. Psychotic Ninja was killing ponies. Suddenly, The world stopped in a matter made of Alyxx's collection of rare manly movies, like Commando and Terminator, which are the best movies since sliced bread. All the people wanted to be like Captain Crunch, but Epsilon's awesomeness was too powerful for mere cereal n' milk so he guffawed at Tony the Tiger, who was clawing Captain Figunaye unsuccessfully. Tony then donned his beanie, and

What's he going to do? Tolerate us? Pfft.

Banned because we now need a Sergeant Sherlock here.

Who here knew that one day giant lumberjacks would chop down trees and drink cheap cyanide filled Koolaid and go to Epsilon's planet of chicken and sweet tea and guns that shoot boolets? Not only do cows eat grass but also they jump over the moon and leave ponies in rest. It was very nonsensical and confusing, only /b/ could possibly make less sense than the chaotic, random, ambiguous Gordon Freeman's dream. The G-man woke up to a de-railed thread on a very sad day. He was wearing a very expensive diamond encrusted tie and suit with a dark blue pair of socks. His fashion sense was very pimpin'. Everyone was jelly whenever the G-man would roll up into a ball and derail this thread. G-man then got into his purple limousine and drove into a Lake. G-man drowned, but his suit was made of ice cream That froze into a million pieces. Many treasure hunters search for G-man's suit shards but stop because they get very hungry for potatoes and decide to return to idaho. G-man survived though, but his purple limousine got eaten by a wild grue with laser beams. G-man took out his explosive briefcase and threw it at an unsuspecting robotic ghost dragon. Gordon Freeman helped by crowbaring a flying scout's mother and red spy. Any other day Gordon would simply would be busy collecting human skulls, but today he went to crate to crowbar it. The crate exploded, and out came a BLU Pyro. The Pyro's muffled voice yelled, "ICE TO MEET YOU!" "..." Gordon Freeman replied, and crowbarred Pyro in the oxygen tank, causing a large explosion, but Gordon's HEV only saved Gordon and a village of crazed bushmen. One bushman said "So long, and good luck my bespectacled bearded friend.". So he was gone like the horse that Epsilon ate for breakfast. Blightmare then came with a great white shark who Epsilon wrestled like famous pirate Figunaye. Psychotic Ninja was killing ponies. Suddenly, The world stopped in a matter made of Alyxx's collection of rare manly movies, like Commando and Terminator, which are the best movies since sliced bread. All the people wanted to be like Captain Crunch, but Epsilon's awesomeness was too powerful for mere cereal n' milk so he guffawed at Tony the Tiger, who was clawing Captain Figunaye unsuccessfully.

Banned because Bronies don't play violent shooter games like FO3/FO:NV.

Banned because it's from the bloody mess perk in Fallout.

You honestly think I didn't know that? -_-

The MLP thread and the image war thread.

...I don't see them in any threads other than those, one of which (the former) was DESIGNED to have ponies in it.

Yeap. Give me a dark, menacing sky any day. The soothing tapping of rain on the roof... Lighting and thunder if at all possible.

And hail and tornadoes if you live in the Southeast.

The dark, menacing clouds are clearing up; it's partly cloudy now.

Banned because your sig is a pistol to someone's face.