Dr. Derpy Hooves Ph.D

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I don't see you act like that online... Most of the time.

Well, I dunno...

Nice avatar.

DASH! i'm so happy you're here! *takes out scalpel*

I win...

AWESOME HAIR

I HAVE A MAGIC ROCK IT SINGS TO ME!

Never have I laughed harder in my life.

You seem pretty anti-social RD :/

It's part of my Asperger Syndrome.

Quack under it's caged kitten.

L M F A O

Today at lunch-

Marcus: Are you a homosexual?

Me: Nope.

Marcus: Are you a homosexual?

Me: Nope.

Marcus: Are you a homosexual?

Me: Nope.

Marcus: Are you a homosexual?

Me: Nope.

Marcus: Are you a homosexual?

Me: Nope.

Marcus: Are you a homosexual?

Me: Nope.

Marcus: Are you a homosexual?

Me: Nope.

Marcus: Are you a Heterosexual?

Me: Eeyup.

Marcus: F**K!

Today in Professional communications-

Teacher: Do the assignment on page (I ain't gonna spend an hour trying to think of the page number. -.-) of your Professional Communications book.

Assignment:

Define the following words:

Listening

Hearing

Speaking

Interpreting

Decoding

My answers:

Listening: What none of the students here know how to do

Hearing: Every student's sad excuse for listening

Speaking: What the students here do too much of

Decoding: Something the students don't care to do.

Interpreting: The reason why the students here don't learn, They don't even know what Interpretation is.

Today in Algebra 1-

Me: Are you 3 idiots gonna actually work or just sit there derping around for the rest of the period.

Student#1: Oh, I forgot we were in math.

Me: There's an Asian math teacher right there and students all around you.

Student#3: Ah, just give me your answers.

Me: Alright.

(Gives the students in my group incorrect answers)

Student#2: Ha, we're passin' this sh*t, that kid's smart.

Today, also at lunch-

Me: Hey, you up there in the doorway, you can't be that fat to be blocking the entire thing.

The kid in the doorway: Bitch, I'm-

Me: Oh, YOU MAD!

Kid: NO I'M NOT

Me: YOU'RE SO MAD RIGHT NOW!

Kid: NO I'M F**KING NOT.

Me: Stop shouting it.

Kid: BITCH I CAN SAY IT HOWEVER THE FUCK I WANT TO!

(One of the school's 3 principals walks in)

One side of my family is German, the other, Rednecks, as for what side of the family my mother's on;

p5zJoRQ4e60

"IT ALL HAPPENED BECAUSE OF YOU! I SPENT FOREVER IN THOSE GODDAMNED TUNNELS! I GOT SHOT, VOMITED ON, BURNT, BITTEN, BLUDGEONED, NEARLY DROWNED, AND NEARLY GOT BLOWN UP! PEOPLE DIED, AND I DIDN'T EVEN MAKE ANY MONEY OUT OF IT! IT'S LIKE I SAID WAY BACK AT THE START: "ALL ALIENS ARE BASTARDS!" YOU'RE IN CHARGE OF THESE ALIENS! YOU ARE LITERALLY THE BIGGEST BASTARD OF ALL! JUST FUCKING DIE!"

 

I am aware that this was terrible, but it is best I could come up with in like two minutes.

That was FUCKING perfect.

"Oh, it's about bloody time! I finally get to get my hands on the guy responsible for all this shit! Die you, motherfu-" FREEEEEEEEEEEMAAAAAAAANNN!!!!! "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?! I... you know what? I don't even care anymore. The fact that a giant-alien-robot-fetus-overlord is pissed at me for killing his minions and his big-ass walking-armored-spider-testicle and is about to kill me in an extremely violent manner just doesn't phase me. That's how incredibly fucked up my life has become withing the past... what? 48 hours?"

That was perfect.

When entering Xen, sarcastically: "I wouldn't be surprised if some giant flying fetus was waiting for me."

Upon seeing Nihilanth: "CHRIST! Why do I always have to be right?!?!"

That was also perfect.

Troll the Westboro Baptist Church. They have to have some sort of contact info.

Jesus Christ, Rarity already told you to stop discussing it!

Back on topic.

I'm in a very trollish mood right now.

I just created another Landover Baptist account and they banned me because I have Asperger Syndrome.

 

 

...self righteous cock suckers.

We should have some of the AF users create an account on landover and make a spam post. (there's a 300 wait period between posts)

Just sayin'.

High five, Dash

The answer to the quiz was Cupcake/Sugarcup (They're the same pony, just different names)

 

Again @Dashy. Landover is FAKE! They're all a bunch of trolls (maybe some are idiotic enough to think it's real and support it, but that's a very small number.

So I can't troll them? I love trolling Homophobics and Racists.

I just created another Landover Baptist account and they banned me because I have Asperger Syndrome.

I made a my little pony thread on Landover Baptist to see how they react, I probably already have a "god mocking homosexual" title... those people are idiots.

Where is it? Is it in Satan's Entertainment? If so I think it got deleted.

It was in introductions, they gave me an "unsaved trash" title and edited my post to say "** animal porn removed **"

And after defining pornography for them, they got all pissed and said "Have fun in hell"

Here's how it went:

Random fag: Reported, enjoy your ban

Random fag: Heathen's comments removed, praise!

Me:

*insert pornography definition here*

Therefore, this isn't animal pornography.

Random fag: Got that from a dictionary, did you? Well, have fun in hell.

(I actually defined it myself)

Me: Was that "Have fun in hell" comment directed to me or the entire Landover Baptist community?

(deleted, banned, they mad)

Does that make Dashy the idiot?

Also, I'm switching to Zalgo dash, I hate the G3 dash, she ain't even a pegasus!

I made a my little pony thread on Landover Baptist to see how they react, I probably already have a "god mocking homosexual" title... those people are idiots.

I'm probably already known as unsaved trash on there.

Laughing so hard right now, According to this guy's signature (on Landover Baptist) Hypocrites will be sent to hell.

Does that mean all of Landover Baptist's community is headed there, or are their skulls just too thick?

I'm thinking of creating an account, posting ponies on there and seeing what they say about it.

"Half the Internet is populated by Homosexuals who call themselves "bronies""

Oh cool, 4 pages and we're already off topic.

Let's just banish this thread to the second page.

Oh you're gonna get it now. Just you wait, when you're going to bed tonight your pillow will be all warm....on both sides! MUWHAWHAWH

I OWN A PILLOW STORE

Hey, we here in "I don't know, I really don't" are good friends with the Eskimos. So you watch your mouth.

You were adopted. Your real parents ARE eskimos.