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Kojima Without Boundaries

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Some of the wisecracks about Hideo Kojima's new production company and his recently revealed title Death Stranding has been tickling me in all the right funny places. See below for an example of what I'm talking about...

 

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Most of the jokes I've read relate to Mr. Kojima's reputation as a bit of creative firebrand, his bold statements about pushing gaming paradigms and inverting expectations, including but not limited to a concept of a "raw gaming experience" in an interview some years ago in which he had an idea to make a game which would lock out players if they let the main character perish - in other words, if you die you can never play the game again.

 

I hope you understand that this thread in only done in jest and that actually I love Kojima's expansive and unrestrained ideas about what gaming could entail, which his dreams about console peripherals that blows air and fragrances at players in order to immerse them in a given setting, and other such imaginative forays into possibilities for the medium. In this thread, please post some similar yarns to those in the above screen capture. Imagine just what Kojima will do with this new title now that he seemingly no corporate pressure and no restraint at the hands of his previous benefactors Konami.

 

~

 

  • In Death Stranding the player can pick up animals and collectibles, both living, dead and/or partially eaten. Depending on what state you find them in-game, Kojima Productions will get your real life address and send you an individual of the actual species you collected, in whatever state you found them in.
  • Anybody who picks up a physical copy of the game will trigger nanomachines present in the box itself which will go about altering the DNA of the buyer. Slowly but surely you will become a Were-Kojima, and transform into a half-Japanese game developer every time you watch a cutscene.
  • The butt naked protagonist of Death Stranding only attack involves crying manly tears at his enemies, whatever they might be.
  • All of the bosses are actually dead when your arrive at their lairs. The aim is bring them back to life.
  • The final game will only be available on vinyl.

When close friends speak ill of close friends

they pass their abuse from ear to ear

in dying whispers -

even now, when prayers are no longer prayed.

What sounds like violent coughing

turns out to be laughter.

Shuntarō Tanikawa

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