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Random Writing.

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Hi guys, this is just some random writing I've done. I'm fairly young, and always want to improve. Please leave opinions, as this forum contains the most mature people I've ever met.


A single incident changed my life forever. If I hadn’t saved lives on that day, I might be a stockbroker now, not an undercover agent for the Australian Secret Intelligence Service. It's all I know now, but I wouldn't trade it for the world.


I stepped onto the train, smiling warmly. I was looking forward to today. I felt good vibes, and didn’t think that much could go wrong.


I wasn’t worried particularly about anyone on the train, at fifteen I was athletic with a stocky build, and was a black belt in Jujitsu.


I wondered how my friends were going, what they were doing. They were probably asleep, I remember being jealous of them, as I had to wake up at five o’clock to get ready for school.


As I sat down, I let my mind wander. There were people around me talking, yelling. I tuned out, enjoying my own thoughts. The people around me all seemed to blend in.


After a minute or two, the train arrives at the next stop. My face flushed, which was even more obvious because of my pale skin. A girl I had liked was there. Her innocent face, and her soft friendly eyes made her seem wonderful to me.


I looked at her for a moment, before looking away. I had a few more stops to go before I had to get off, but I imagined her and I together. With my family feeling such hardships, my mother and father were both out of work, they could barely pay for me to go to school. Such good thoughts came less and less often for me.


I smiled for a minute, letting the thought wash over me, before I heard screaming and my eyes snapped open.



I stood up, men were coming onto the train, carrying weapons. My heart started to beat faster than it had ever beat in my life. I felt like I was to die, I saw one of them push the innocent faced girl toward me, and I grabbed her.

“It’ll be okay.” I said to her, my white-blonde hair fell into her face, and I brushed it away, “Don’t worry about it.” My voice was softer than silk.

She looked up at me, her eyes seemed to look right at my very soul, “I believe you.” Her voice was calm and collected. I had no idea how she was keeping her cool.

I nodded at her, and held her tightly, “What’s your name?” I asked her shyly, before going red. I couldn’t believe how stupid the question I was asking was.

“I’m Marie.” She said, smiling, “And I know your name is Lachlan, the girls in the group talk about you all the time.”

I frowned. I had never noticed anyone talking about me at all. I guess they did it at school, which was nice, but somewhat odd.


One of the armed men looked at us...

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I like it, sounds like you could make a good first person story with it

This is the end of the line, and I'll rip you apart for what's inside.

Compensating wealth for what's more and more worthlessness.

The end of fear, the end of your life, I'll kill you right now, fucking die.

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