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A documentary on the ability of certain animals and some people to navigate by sensing electromagnetic fields.

 

Black Snake Moan.

He just kept talking and talking in one long incredibly unbroken sentence moving from topic to topic so that no one had a chance to interrupt it was really quite hypnotic...

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Well, I have never heard of this movie and, without researching it, I have little to go off of but the name. So, this should be perfect. ;)

 

Black Snake Moan is a horror movie about a black snake that menaces a group of teenagers in the Florida Everglades. You can tell it's close by the noise it makes: moans.

 

High School High

The Official Accursed Farms Subtitles Compendium: https://goo.gl/aTBvzj

--

Project Manager for Ross's Movie

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A documentary about a school where the students don't know how to live without weed.

 

Anime time!

The End of Evangelion.

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There's a planet wide war going on at the planet Evangelion. In the middle of the war, the king of one of the six nations sends his one and only son to the planet Earth (even though it's light years away, it's movie law to send your son to Earth) to learn the ways of the humans there.

 

 

Digimon: Revenge of Diaboromon

Quote

"We don't call them loot boxes", they're 'surprise mechanics'" - EA

 

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The return of the ancient evil sealed inside of a public portable toilet.

 

The Fifth Element

"That which you do not know, is not a moral charge against you; but that which you refuse to know, is an account of infamy growing in your soul. Make every allowance for errors of knowledge; do not forgive or accept any breach of morality."

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(love that movie)

It's a pornographic spoof of the tv show avitar the last air bender. The fifith eminent was cum

(oh God what's wrong with me!?)

 

Zoolander

non-euclidean fuck machine

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Dammit; you got there before I did, Felix. Here's my take on the Fifth Element:

 

When five teenage kids mysteriously get rings associated with the classical elements of Earth, Fire, Wind, Water, and Heart, they combine the magical power in the rings to bring forth a mysterious being with the power of saving the planet from destruction.

 

For Zoolander:

A man visits a local zoo only to find he cannot leave. If he attempts to leave the zoo, he appears in another one in another city, another state, even another country. He must find how to escape the mysterious land of zoos.

 

Monster House

The Official Accursed Farms Subtitles Compendium: https://goo.gl/aTBvzj

--

Project Manager for Ross's Movie

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A story about police trying to get a serial killer with three hostages out of a house. It was a low budget film.

 

Every Bleach movie ever.

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A video documentary about the birth of something everyone uses... THE INTERNET!

 

 

 

The Room.

Quote

"We don't call them loot boxes", they're 'surprise mechanics'" - EA

 

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The story of a man who is betrayed by his wife, but it has so many subplots that don't go anywhere, bad acting and people throwing a football around that, by the end, when...no, wait, that's stupid. No one would make a movie like that.

 

The Room is about a public restroom where you can catch small glimpses into the lives of random people who come into it, set against the backdrop of a conquering alien invasion force.

 

The Toxic Avenger

The Official Accursed Farms Subtitles Compendium: https://goo.gl/aTBvzj

--

Project Manager for Ross's Movie

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The epic story of that melting guy from the end of Robocop, the exact same footage but edited with so much slowmo that it becomes a 3 hour megafest.

 

Appleseed

"That which you do not know, is not a moral charge against you; but that which you refuse to know, is an account of infamy growing in your soul. Make every allowance for errors of knowledge; do not forgive or accept any breach of morality."

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Disney's rendition on the Johnny Appleseed tale.

 

 

Ernest Scared Stupid.

Quote

"We don't call them loot boxes", they're 'surprise mechanics'" - EA

 

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Here's a script excerpt from that film:

 

Well, since Lois is the mayor,

I'm allowed to reroute all the town's electricity.

What'd you do that for?

So I could reanimate the corpse of Jim Varney.

Howdy, Vern.

This is some dad-gum nicehouse you got here, Vern.

That's Vern, V-Vern,Vern, Vern.

Oh, wait, wait, it was John Belushi, that's who I wanted.

Peter, how could you...?

Way ahead of you, Brian. My mistake, I'll take care of this.

- Hey, Jim, come out in the yard, will ya? - Sure thing, Vern.

He got the shotgun, Brian!

Don't ask me how he did it, but Jim Varney got the shotgun!

- Run for your life! - What?!

Run!

(There seems to be no clips of that gag that I can find or else I would've had a video)

 

The Count of Monte Cristo

"That which you do not know, is not a moral charge against you; but that which you refuse to know, is an account of infamy growing in your soul. Make every allowance for errors of knowledge; do not forgive or accept any breach of morality."

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Explosive news rocks the Vatican and the rest of the theological world when it's discovered that Jesus Christ was resurrected as game show host Monty Hall, told from the perspective of Hall's companion: The Count of Monty Christo.

 

EDIT: Wait, let me pick a different movie. Try this one:

The Full Monty

The Official Accursed Farms Subtitles Compendium: https://goo.gl/aTBvzj

--

Project Manager for Ross's Movie

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A documentary about Three-card Monte and the impact it's made on modern gaming.

 

Atlas Shrugged

"Am I a hero? Eh, I don't know... I don't think it's heroic if the only person you're saving is yourself."

- Gordon Freeman

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A movie with just raw video footage and a crazy homeless guy screaming ghost every five seconds even though through the entire movie you don't see a ghost.

 

Fight Club

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A possessed Club sandwich fights for it's life in a Mall food court.

 

The Hills Have Eyes

"Am I a hero? Eh, I don't know... I don't think it's heroic if the only person you're saving is yourself."

- Gordon Freeman

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When Maria and the Von Trapp Family Singers escape Austria after the Nazis took it over, they sang a reprise to "The Hills Are Alive", a group of spies known as "The Hills Have Eyes" recruit the Von Trapps to infiltrate the Nazi regime. The theme song changes to "The Hills Have Eyes (With the Sound of Music)".

 

The Grudge

The Official Accursed Farms Subtitles Compendium: https://goo.gl/aTBvzj

--

Project Manager for Ross's Movie

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